Zoe's Woman Issues

I'm not sure why this is funny, but it is.  To me anyway.

There's a fifth member of the Tree Climbing family.  Her name is Zoe and she's roughly 10 years old and extraordinarily hairy.  We adopted her back in 2000, but I don't think she realized she's a dog until we had Doc Brown.  She's actually quite a good dog and very, very sweet.

Anyway, Zoe has been doing this nasty chew on her foot thing.  I tried changing her food to see if that would help (for those of you without dogs the type of food they eat really affects their skin - kind of like chocolate gives us pimples except dogs get itchy).  We didn't see any change so I took her to the vet yesterday.

We have a long history with veterinarians.  I've taken Zoe to vets all over town who have tried to pimp out everything from doggie acupuncture (so not kidding) to paying $300 to have her put under so her teeth can be professionally cleaned.  That last vet actually asked me if I brush her teeth every day.  I said, "Look, I have 2 children and I'm lucky if their teeth are brushed every day."  (Oh, so a bad dog owner and a bad mother!)

And I can't begin to tell you how many times I've been told my dog is fat.  No, we don't overfeed her and no, (head hung way down) we don't walk her.  That's when I go on a tremendous guilt trip and feel the need to do a song and dance number for the vet about how much we love Zoe.  Not enough to pay for acupuncture or major dental work, but enough to make her (I think) a very happy dog.

Back in January I took Zoe to a vet that came highly recommended by my sister (who, by the way, shared my same struggle to find a vet who understood that not every household dollar could be spent on the dog).  They were great.  Just shots with no lecture.  Perfect.

But you can imagine my concern yesterday when the vet started to ask questions about Zoe that had nothing to do with her skanky foot.  "She's a little overweight" (the nicest way it's ever been put), "Um, does her hair always grow back this uneven after you've had it cut?" (I started to feel sorry for Zoe and wanted to cover her ears).  Nice vet man explained that her weight, thinning hair and skin problems could be indicators of.... hypothyroidism.

Isn't that a people thing?  I get the giggles every time I think about it.  I mean, every woman I know has been getting her thyroid checked.  I've had my thyroid checked.  Apparently, lady dogs have thyroid issues too.   Thankfully, the vet said it's not life threatening for dogs (read: not expensive), but it should explain a recurrence in skin issues.  

I just want it in writing so I can go back to every vet who's harassed me about Zoe's weight so I can say, "She's not fat, it's her thyroid!"